"Don't walk behind me I will not lead, don't walk in front of me I will not follow, just walk beside me and be my friend."- Unknown
I know this sounds very strange, but are there other people out there who connect with people on a very emtional and mental level. I mean you walk up and met someone and before you know it they are crying or they are telling there lifes deepest darkest secrets, or everyone says i just feel so comfrontable being around you. You are a helper, a guider, a true friend who offers a gift that not many will, unconditional love. No matter what they do to you, you will always put them and others first, above yourself. The funny thing is that it is just not being a friend it is true empathy for what is going on in their lives.
I call it a curse in a way. People cross your path and into your life when ever they need help or a leg to stand on. For whatever amount of time you give unconditional till they are ready to fly again.
What this does to love is you always get to the pharse "you are a great guy, but let's just be friends"
Any thoughts????
I know this sounds very strange, but are there other people out there who connect with people on a very emtional and mental level. I mean you walk up and met someone and before you know it they are crying or they are telling there lifes deepest darkest secrets, or everyone says i just feel so comfrontable being around you. You are a helper, a guider, a true friend who offers a gift that not many will, unconditional love. No matter what they do to you, you will always put them and others first, above yourself. The funny thing is that it is just not being a friend it is true empathy for what is going on in their lives.
I call it a curse in a way. People cross your path and into your life when ever they need help or a leg to stand on. For whatever amount of time you give unconditional till they are ready to fly again.
What this does to love is you always get to the pharse "you are a great guy, but let's just be friends"
Any thoughts????
posted by StarofTexas41 at 5:10 AM
8 Comments:
You sound like someone I know. I don't know what to say to you buddy, you sound like a great guy but love shuns you.
What I can offer is that love cannot be expected. Take a turn around the corner, who knows, it's waiting for you there.
You'll meet true love. Trust me. We all do, at least once in a lifetime. Just make sure you are ready when it's ready for you.
Thanks for your kind words your higness
Hey StarofTexas, Thank you for visiting my blog and your appreciation. You have a pretty good blog yourself.
I am not much older than you, just a few months here and there, so i will not try to preach :). It is just that i have had a set of experiences that have helped me deal with a situation similar to yours. This is what i think.
Firstly, if you give unconditionally you will always be taken for granted. Just don't do it.
Secondly, Never get into a situation where women want you just for your friendship. When they start needing you as a shoulder to cry on, tell them you have something else to do. You might lose a couple of potential friends but you will be compensated with a couple of girls who will seek you out and take the relationship farther. That is a good sign. Mind you i don't mean you do this to existing friends, that boat has probably sailed long ago. :)
Thirdly, from day one make your interest explicit, don't even let the other person think that you have intentions lesser than sex and marriage :).
Sorry if i sound harsh, but frankly too much goodness is not attractive (to women or men). The barometer is always, will the girl think about the few moments she has spent with you when she goes to sleep that night?? you have to do stuff that makes her think abt you. The more she thinks about you the more she falls in love with you :). It is true actually for both men and women.
As i said, i will TRY not to preach :). Have a good dday and keep writing....
Thanks Cool Fire I appreciate your words
This sound exactly like me... And as i have always claimed - helping or loving unconditionally is not always the best thing to do. But i just can't do otherwise. I was brought up like that and i don't think it is in my power to change it. Or maybe i just don't want to change it...
But my advice is: don't take that way, u'll suffer cause it is rarely appreciated nowadays.
Take care...
Don't be so quick to generalize. You might be surprised at who is just waiting for you to make the first move.
Sorry, that last comment was from me. Forgot to sign my name. :o)
Jessica
I've been sitting on what Cool Fire said since yesterday trying to decide how and if I should respond to it. Think I would be remiss to just let it slide without comment.
Cool Fire: "Thirdly, from day one make your interest explicit, don't even let the other person think that you have intentions lesser than sex and marriage :)."
If you want a relationship that will last, this is the absolute wrong way to go about it. First of all, I, as a woman, am not an object or toy a man can use to appease his desires. Nor am I interested in any relationship where what I get is a reward for my performance. If any man tells me his intentions are for sex and marriage (especially the sex part), as far as I am concerned, he's not worth my time, because it is obvious that he has no interest in me as a person. He just wants my body. If he does not respect me enough to wait for sex until after we are married, then he doesn't respect me at all.
Jessica
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