Silence

And then there was silence. I have gotten a lot of bad news from back home the last month, first my neighbor, then one of my friends parents and today my mom told me that a friend of mine from high school died. I remember him like it was yesterday. He was also really sort of goofy. When i was a freshmen he was a senior but i played on the varisty football team. He wasn't a good player in fact he never got to play unless we were very far ahead. But you know he was out there with us everyday of practice. He was really funny. He has two small children. It is one of these times that make me think. Life is a very precious gift. Don't delay what you can do today for tomorrow.
Peace my friend and God Speed.

I Swear

"I wanted a perfect ending. Now I've learned, the hard way, that some poems don't rhyme, and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle, and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next. Delicious ambiguity". ~ Gilda Radner, 1946-1989

I really don't think i need to say more. But i hope this finds you well.

"If we deny love that is given to us, if we refuse to give love because we fear the pain of loss, then our lives will be empty, our loss greater." ~ Tanis HalfElven from the Dragonlance saga

Friday

I have used this before. But it just felt right today. You can stop and look at the rainbow or you can move ahead. But the rainbow may not wait. When things get really really complicated, things get tangled what do you want....You can live life for tomorrow or you can choose to live today.

After awhile you learn
the subtle difference between
holding a hand and chaining a soul
and you learn that love doesn't mean possession
and company doesn't mean security.
And you begin to learn that kisses aren't contracts
and presents aren't promises and you begin to accept
your defeats with your head up and your eyes ahead
with the grace of an adult not the grief of a child.
And you learn to build your roads today
because tomorrow's ground is too uncertain for plans
and futures have ways of falling down in mid-flight.
After awhile you learn that even sunshine
burns if you get too much so you plant your
own garden and decorate your own soul
instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers.
And you learn that you really can endure
that you really are strong
and you really do have worth
and you learn
and you learn...


Veronica A. Shoffstall

"The essential sadness is to go through life without loving. But it would be almost equally sad to leave this world Without ever telling those you loved that you love them." - Author Unknown

Fading

Questions, thoughts, in the end i think everyone just wants to feel loved. I wish it were easier but it isn't. Again, can a fairy tale survive in a world that values materials more than the heart. And the light grows dim.

"I wanted a perfect ending. Now I've learned, the hard way, that some poems don't rhyme, and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle, and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next. Delicious ambiguity". ~ Gilda Radner, 1946-1989

A friend sent this to me and i had to share. I really am not sad more complexed by the questions which i have asked. A lot of thinking...to do

Be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart
and try to love the questions themselves...
Do not now seek the answers,
which cannot be given to you because you will not be able to live them.And the point is, to live everything.
Live the questions now.
Perhaps you will then gradually,
without noticing it,
live along some distant day into the answer.
Rainer Maria Rilke

well this is the qoute from friend i thought was great

When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us.
- Helen Keller

The four hardest tasks on earth are neither physical nor intellectual feats, but spiritual ones: To return love for hate; to include the excluded; to forgive without apology, and to be able to say 'I was wrong.'

I began this page/blog with a very simple question. Does true love really exist. I don't know the answer to that. What I have learned since i asked that question is that life is a very funny thing. People come, people go. Those who were close turn out to not be who you thought they were and in the end you have to ask them and yourself. The heart of the matter is a matter of the heart. I don't know how many times i have had this conversation. But in the end is it love or just not wanting to be alone....

A friend sent this to me. I think it is really a great song. In a way it is what i am thinking. What do you do when the world around you is a lie? Sometimes I wish life was fairy tale story.

In the end I like this qoute it is so true...

"The heart has its reasons which reason does not know."- Blaise Pascal

Life is a funny thing

"Do you love me because I am beautiful,
or am I beautiful because you love me?"
~Cinderella~

It is funny how in the period of one day life can change again. It is so crazy. How in the period of one day everything that you hid in your heart is back again. For some reason the sun rise seemed a little bit brighter today and the stars last night were singing...

Love is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion. That is just being "in love" which any of us can convince ourselves we are.

Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. Your mother and I had it, we had roots that grew towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossom had fallen from our branches we found that we were one tree and not two.
- Captain Corelli's Mandolin